Today is my mother’s birthday. Barbara passed quietly in 2008 with my sister and I by her side. There is no such thing as a ‘perfect mother’, but she came as close as anyone could have to that title.
We were close. So close that I felt my soul connected to hers, still even when I was a rambunctious teenager. It was as if there was an invisible energy stream running between us, connected, that was never interrupted no matter the distance or time of day. Eventually we had our disagreements, which comes with maturing into your own being and taking wing. But they were minor spats and short lived. That energy stream was always there, even when dementia robbed her short term memory and she forgot who people were, that recognition between us remained.
This morning, I wasn’t quite sure of today’s date and I always mixed up her birthday with other important dates around the same time. Name and date recall has never been my strong suit. But I went into my studio this morning determined to spend an hour going through boxes of files recently moved from the basement, to find an important document and get that checked off my list right away. The first box I picked up had some photos on top, and then… there were photos of my mom and dad, of the family, a stack of bereavement cards from her passing, with long letters of love from family and friends.
Then a bird began to sing right outside my window on this cold, snowy day. She loved birds and birdsong so very much.
I looked at the date on my computer, called my sister to verify and yes, it’s my mom’s birthday. I then found the last birthday card I had bought her just before she passed. And in my mind’s eye I can see her smiling. Smiling as she almost always did. Even the bereavement letters all mention her smiling, laughing and joyful way that brought happiness to others.
You may call it a coincidence that I first picked up this one random box this morning … but I call it a message from my mom. It is her way of letting me know she’s still around, still smiling, still laughing with joy. She’s sending me (and the whole family) a card for her birthday. She would do that. She was so thoughtful that way and… still is.
With all of the years I have connected with deceased loved ones for my clients the experiences have ranged from subtle to profound, life altering and grief abating. I have been stunned too, shocked, humored, taught, and mostly uplifted and inspired by the light, the joy, the amazing unconditional love and support that our loved ones continue to share from the other side.
I have witnessed the soul visually leaving at the time of death, and at the time a prayer for uplifting the spirit of the departed has been uttered by clergy. It has taken my breath away. But no more so than the communications from those who have not gone but entered another realm of energy that our density doesn’t often have visual access to. Still they care, they guide, do what they can to help.
It is a consolation and validation I wish everyone could witness. Sadness, remorse, guilt, are difficult barriers for them to move through. But make no mistake. You are still being loved and guided by your family and friends who have crossed, no matter the circumstances. Keeping that connection open in your heart gives them permission to assist you more powerfully from their field of life.
Today, I wish a Happy Birthday to my mom, Barbara Miller.
AND, I wish we all move from grief to belief, because in that place of LOVE is where we meet again.
Joy, Peace, Love, Happy February – The Month of Love.